some complaining, followed by dispensing

Praise the Lord. 

Preface to this entry: First off, I've never seen a blog entry with a preface. Nevertheless, I thought it might be necessary to forewarn the reader of following series of mixed thoughts that are poorly transitioned. I hope the keeping of this blog would help me learn to organize my train of thought. Secondly, I tend to switch languages often, usually in attempt to maintain precision in expression. A line of thought may be expressed more accurately in one language than in another, depending on what is said and how it needs to be said. OK, I admit, sometimes it's just for fun. Use an electronic translator if needed, but don't trust in it absolutely—that is, if something seems too outrageous to come from my blog, it probably isn't the most accurate translation. Anyway, enough of the preface... enjoy! And don't waste too much time reading this, it's probably not worth that much of your time! (I mean it!)

I just finished reading a portion of the biography of Andrés Bello, an undertaking not initiated by interest, but rather necessity; I just found out I have to give a report on the guy on Monday for my Spanish-American Civilization class (yoo hoo!). My problem is a recurring one: I begin reading something with the need to extract the principal details from it, and end up liking it and wanting to read the whole thing. The guy was quite interesting, and I can relate to many of his interests—especially in the realm of linguistics and the philosophy of language. Yet with his educational background in humanities, he held some significant governmental and administrative positions. These seemed to be opportunities for transferring much of his formal learning into practical experience, having the tasks of writing, editing, translating and interpreting. Anyway, I can go on and on since I've just put down the book (I'll probably refer back to this entry while compiling points for my powerpoint presentation)…. but I'll leave it alone for now.

…But not entirely. From time to time I've been considering whether or not to change my major (again). I can never really settle on one thing, as there are always positive and negative aspects to everything I land on. Until today business has struck me as abysmally uninteresting, yet practical in its various facets and virtually ubiquitous in today's selection of careers. I'm managing to pick up the concepts fairly quickly, but some of the classes I've taken have had the tendency of just putting me to sleep. They just don't seem to do it for me like the language classes. Or Geography. Or History. Or Biology. Anything but Business classes seems to do it for me. Nevertheless, it looks like I'm going to stick with it. At least in my case, a lack of interest originates from a lack of understanding. And with some topics, a lack of understanding can produce a lack of desire for investigation of the topic. But in this case, what I understand about the study of business (that it's potentially useful for any given career path) is what will keep me from abandoning it. For some reason the reading I just finished strengthened this thought. 

Também fazendo parte da minha decisão é a questão do tempo exigido para me formar em tal curso de estudos. Parece que, daqui adiante, vou levar mais dois anos e meio para terminar o curso—já tendo feito três anos. À primeira vista isso parece ser longo demais para um curso de comércio exterior—e além disso, para alguém que não gosta tanto do tema. E com reclamação de muitos outros aspectos, a mente fica bem inquieto e traz consigo emoções engrandecedoras. Enfim, o ser interior fica perturbado e aborrecido com todo o sistema educacional. Antes de tudo cair em colapso, bem na hora de desistir, o espírito revolta—não quer mais ficar quieto, sossegado, negligenciado—oooooh, Senhor Jesus! 

…E ao render tudo ao precioso Senhor, o Deus da paz, a paz de Deus, que excede todo entendimento, vem me encher, me livrar da vaidade dos conceitos que só dão problemas (Ajudou bastante visitar hoje aquela florestinha no campus... gostei demais dela).  Hei de aprender que não sou o meu dono, e que nem o tempo que gasto no dia-a-dia é meu. Então se o Senhor já fez com que eu permanecesse aqui estudando o quanto tempo Ele determinar, em qual outro lugar vou achar a paz Dele? Não, outro lugar não dá, não senhor. Nem outro curso. Nem outro prazo de tempo. Amém.

Good meeting tonight at the Harvey's. I hope the Lord would really build us together in that meeting this semester. 

At any rate, I'm convinced. However this turns out, whatever resistance in need of relinquishing, whatever obstacle(s) in line for removal, I'm on the glory train in the tunnel of transformation. This train is full of supply, refreshing, renewing, dispensing. From one degree of glory to the next!